I'll Be Sure and Turn the Lights Off When I Leave

First and most important, I want to thank 'Sunshine' for inviting myself and our great friend Nicole to guest blog in her absence. I am honored and hope that I can bring some joy and entertainment to her readers as she has for years. I feel as if I have been asked to house-sit for her while she is away. So being very careful not to spill on her carpet, leave the lights on or forget to water her plants, I am kicking my feet up on her coffee table and relaxing on her couch (but please don't tell her) and telling my story......

My name is Robert, and as she and Nicole have mentioned, we all went to school together in small town, rural Iowa. We lived in what Nicole refers to as 'an alphabet town'. Many small towns in Iowa combine themselves with other small towns to create schools of many letters. This is how I had come to know 'Sunshine'. At the start of my senior year, our community was joined by 2 other small towns to form the school we have now. Thats what brought 'Sunshine' into Nicoles and my life. As Nicole mentioned, she was a golden haired beauty that always smiled, laughed and added fun to whatever event was going on. But I do have proof that she did have a sad side. She was a cheerleader for our basketball team that year that blew thru the season and made it into the first round of the playoffs, where we lost badly. Our yearbook that year of '87 has captured her standing on the side of the court at state looking as is she is about to cry, and chewing her fingernails. (pg. 69). Her look expressed the emotions of everyone. We all knew that she would be special and be the wonderful person she is.

She had suggested we discuss the aspects of growing up in Iowa. Nicole did a great job capturing the 'small town' feel of growing up an Iowan. Now I would like to add some more great reasons why I am proud to call myself an Iowan.

I feel I am a special type of Iowa person because I wasn't born there....I moved there! I may not be native, but I grew up in the heartland. Now for any of you who react the same way people do to me when they ask where I'm from......by asking "Where?" when I say Iowa...come along with me on a journey thru the 'Hawkeye State'........

First, we do NOT grow potatoes! We specialize in corn and soybeans. We have the distinct ability to add letters to words when they really don't belong. For example, ask an Iowan to say "I like to wash my own car.".... and you will discover they will add an "R" to wash and create 'warsh'. Trust me, I have heard it done. Where else can you hear someone say "I can row them now" and absolutely not be talking about a boat. It refers to when the corn or soybean stalks peek up thru the soil after planting. Giving you the ability to see the corn 'rows'. To us, detassling corn during the summer was a way to buy a car, or take our sweetheart to Marshaltown to 'scoop the loop'. Again, this has nothing to do with ice cream. We be cruising in our cars. We actually would..."go home and catch a lightning bug and put him in a jar". I'd like to say that Iowa is so flat that if your dog ran away from home, 3 days later you could still see him. Our towns have water towers with the towns name on them. Although I can thankfully say I never saw any one carry a paint can to the top to defend his sisters honor.

Our beloved state is home to many of the products you use. The best tractor manufacturer, John Deere is out of Iowa. Some of the professional concrete contractors in the country use 'Marshaltown' brand trowels and tools from Marshaltown Iowa. Marshaltown is also the birthplace of the best sandwich ever made, like Nicole mentioned....Maid-Rites! Taylors in downtown M-town. This type of sandwich was featured in the hit show 'Rosanne' as she referred to them as 'loose-meat'. Some of the parts to Winnebago Motorhomes come from Iowa. Our little town also claims fame to having the blackest, richest dirt in the world. We also can brag as to having the 'Worlds Largest Truck Stop' in Walcott off Interstate 80. Being an former 'over-the-road' truck driver, I have spent many nights there. Who's from Iowa???

Well, besides Nicole, 'Sunshine' and myself...here are some people you may know that come from our beloved state......John Wayne....heard of him? .......Buffalo Bill Cody, who by the way I am a very distant relative of.........actor Tom Arnold.....former model turned actor and complete heartthrob to many young women (and luckiest man alive to us guys) Ashton Kutcher. (married to Demi Moore)....Olympic Gymnast Shawn Johnson is from our state capital......actor Elijah Wood hails from Cedar Rapids......still not impressed? Well how about former Super Bowl MVP with the Rams (now with the Cardinals) quarterback Kurt Warner is from Burlington. He attended University of Northern Iowa which is our lovely 'Sunshines' alma mater.....Super bowl winning tight end with the Indianapolis Colts Dallas Clark is from Livermore. He attended University of Iowa with current Colts teammate Bob Sanders. I also want to mention the 2005 High School NFL Coach of the Year Ed Thomas who was shot and killed recently in a town near where we grew up in. Many of his 292 wins and 1 of his 84 losses were against us. He graduated and sent 4 men from his town to the NFL: Aaron Kampman (Packers), Brad Meester (Jaguars), Casey Weigman (Broncos) and Jeff Devries. ......now there are so many more I could mention and if I missed someone, believe me it was not intentional.

Well, I do hope this sheds some light on our fair state. I know that I am a better man today for growing up in Iowa. I received a better education, better family values, and better friends. I am proud to tell everyone that I grew up in Iowa, even if they don't know what or where it is. Plus, I should mention that my future wife - to - be is another schoolmate of ours from Iowa. So I hold Iowa near and dear.

Well everyone, I hope I was able to entertain and inform you. 'Sunshine' will be back soon so I better wipe down the counters, replace the toilet paper roll, re-stock the fridge and find the T.V. remote. I wish everyone out there health and happiness and until next time, I'll be sure and turn off the lights when I leave.....

Robert

On Iowa, Touchstones and the Chupakabra. A Cautionary Tale.

My name is Nicole, and I went to high school with Sunshine. She asked our friend Robert and I to fill in for her while she's on vacation and suggested writing a bit about ourselves, and then about growing up in Iowa. I'm 39, and turn 40 this October. No, no, don't feel sorry... I find great comfort in the fact that my husband turns 50 ten days later. (Sorry Honey) I have a daughter, aged six, and a son who's five. I was an English/Theater major with emphasis in both acting and playwrighting. I met my husband Steve working in Entertainment. He had a background in screenwriting and we were asked to co-write, produce and direct live action stunt shows here in Reno where we live. We were sent to Universal Studios/Disney World for 'research' then worked with their stunt men, who rigged and choreographed our stunts and pyrotechnics. The most fun ever! We then worked for Cloud Ten Productions. Steve was a story consultant for 'Left Behind,' and I was also hired to write a behind the scenes book on the making of the movie. I've actually blogged for several years, within a small circle of friends. This is my first foray into the world of hitting 'publish' for complete strangers. I'm trying to get past the cold sweats and palpitations! :) But enough about me! Let's talk about Sunshine!

Yes! ...That's the answer to the question everyone wants to know. 'Was Sunshine always as popular, gorgeous, amazing, talented, energetic, resourceful, funny and popular as she is now? She was! I have fond memories of Sunshine keeping the rest of us in endless stitches, exactly as she does now! She was often the glue that held everything and everyone else together. Not much has changed. She was everything I was not in high school. She was the golden haired cheerleader. I was the subject of the question at the bank where my mother worked, when everyone asked, 'Who's that little brown haired boy who's always fishing down at the bridge?'

Before discussing Iowa, although Sunshine is on vacation, I happen to know they have 16 giant Dobermans, named Satan 1-16, respectively, an alarm system and three large cousins named Buck, Jake and Ahab who are house-sitting. Along with watchful neighbors with shot guns. Just wanted to make that clear. Now, back to growing up in Iowa. I've spent two days pondering which memories and thoughts to focus on. As usual, I thought with my stomach. Two Words: Maid Rites! That's right. I said it. How do you explain a steamed, chopped, hamburger sandwich? Pure Perfection! Trust us on this. Many of us ship them to great distances out of pure addiction. Now that my stomach is reminiscing, I also miss 'The Corner.' The local restaurant where everyone knew everyone, and if they didn't, they'd introduce themselves! Perhaps one of THEE first restaurants that introduced tossing peanut shells on the floor! This was the place families went 'out' to dinner, and where kids would hang out after games.

Conrad is a town of about a thousand people, give or take a hundred, depending on the decade. Through farming, the community and sporting events, everyone knew each other. I regret my kids will never know what that sense of connection feels like, as one of the best things about Iowa is the people. The town picnics, the parades, the bake sales and pancake breakfasts, the whole community turning out for school event because they 'knew' the kids. During one of my huband's trips home with me, when staying at the Conrad Guest House, we got a call informing us my brother had fallen and broken his back at his construction site. Literally, by the time we took three minutes to get dressed and shooed, the bank President, riding his bicycle on the way to work, stopped to ask if my brother was okay, as he'd heard he was injured and on his way to the hospital! That's 'news traveling fast,' but with it, true caring and concern. A small town game of 'telephone,' where everyone knows your name. We don't have that here in Reno.

It's hard to explain the comfort that comes from decades of families knowing each other and knowing 'of'' your family. It's quite something to know a thousand people care that you lived. It's special and reassuring. Last summer, home for my 20th high school reunion, I realized that Iowa is my touchstone. Somehow, everything I do and am wasn't validated and real until that moment when I set foot in the town that made it so. And now, my friends, family, and Sunshine, who post and blog about Farmer's Markets and neighbors or teachers we all knew, are the touchstone to 'home' when I can't be there. In word association, Iowa equals home. Nevada equals gambling and the dubious distinction of birthing the 'quickie divorce.' Iowa equals family, even among strangers. Nevada, does not. It's a transient state, and is a desert both relationally and literally speaking. In Iowa there is RAIN! Iowa has moisture and green! It's so humid, hair is soft, skin is plump and your contacts don't tear! My hair was bouncy and shiny in Iowa. The moment I stepped off the plane in Reno seventeen years ago, all the moisture in my body exited at the speed of light, and has never returned. My hair is dry and lifeless, my skin, lackluster. Nevada is brown and dead. Iowa is LIFE! People in Nevada are guarded, but in Iowa, they treat you like family! And hey, to my knowledge, there has never been a Chupakabra sighting in Iowa. So let's just add that to the 'plus' column right now.

In fact, speaking of Chupakabra, I don't think it's any undiscovered type beast at all. Nor is it some rabid, bald coyote with mange and an unfortunate snout. Seeing it all here, it's so clear. Chupakabra is merely a previously moist but presently dehydrated, un-nourished housewife from Reno, who shriveled in the sun, lost their hair and delirious from gambling noises, cigarette smoke, and the housing collapse, wandered away in the night. Blinded and confused as well, due to contacts long ago dried up and plopped out in the heat. I'm not quite sure where the 'drinking of blood of goats and chickens' comes in. Maybe she was thirsty? So in summation: If you see a Chupakabra in Iowa, sitting on a street corner, drooling and macking down Taylor's Maid Rites, or fishing on the bridge down by the creek? Don't shoot! It's just me. Home for the next reunion.

Be Our Guest....

I have a very special surprise.
While I embark on a family journey for the remainder of the week, I have two friends from high school blogging in my stead.

They're not bloggers. I don't even have any idea what they're gonna say here. They could really trash the place. But I do ask you give them a very warm welcome and be polite and good like I know you can be...


AND!!! It's time for another edition of Sunshine's Passport to Fun where you get this nifty button and brag up your home state when I'm gone at the end of the month.
If you are interested in posting about a state you know and love, let me know...click the link to see states that have already been done. Would love to hear some new and fresh perspectives on other parts!

To Ebay or Not To Ebay

I have been asked to put up a post on Ebaying. You see, after our garage sale was over, I took stock of the items that were worth Ebaying (oh, yes, there are things not worth the time it takes to even bother putting on there) and listed several things.

For about seven years I've been on Ebay, first as a buyer then as a seller as well.

Is it perfect? No. But it's pretty good and I've learned a few things along the way.

First, there are some things worth doing. Some not.

Here's a few things I've learned. If it helps you, great.

• List a bunch of stuff at once if you can. There is a certain amount if time invested in getting stuff listed. So if you can save a little time by doing many things at once, it's slightly more satisfying. Also, when people look at your listing, they'll also see links to other things you have for sale so that may increase your stream of potential buyers and increase the final sale amount. Any little bit helps, right?
• Take pictures of the actual item, don't put up a stock photo. I, as a buyer, like to see the real item I'm getting. If its something like a Pottery Barn quilt, then sure, put up a stock photo so somebody can see what it would look like all purdy made up on their bed, but have the REAL ITEM YOU'RE SELLING as your first photo. I think it also helps the integrity of the listing, because you can't fluff up how awesome something is in the picture, what you see is what you get.
• List things so that the listings begin and end during the work day (like if you're in the Central time zone, make sure things are listed around the middle of the day, then East Coasters and West Coasters are all up and at 'em). Why? Well, snipers. Meaning, there are people who watch listings and don't bid on them until the last second. If you're a night owl and you're putting stuff on Ebay at midnight, you're gonna lose a lot of snipers. If your listings end at a reasonable time of day, you might get some great last second bidding going on.
• What is worth listing? In the time I've been selling things here and there on Ebay, I have found certain things are worth selling. Anything where I'm only going to make a buck profit - not worth it. Good things: name brand childrens' clothes, large lots of childrens' clothes (all the same size, brand doesn't matter), electronics (especially old video games or previous builds of things), collectibles, brand name toys (if you have a Dora umbrella or something that got used once and is super cute and no one would be able to buy it at a store anymore, go ahead and list that sucker....somebody will buy it)
• What is especially worth it? The highest return on my $$ is Hanna Andersson clothing. It is nice, Swedish clothing that is pretty expensive as far as casual kids' clothes are concerned. But the quality is so good and it's organic cotton that gets softer and doesn't fade when washed (and that European red dye NEVER runs!), that it's kind of better when used than new. Everybody who has Hanna clothes for their kids knows this so the Ebay sales of Hanna stuff is INSANITY. I had an outfit (playdress and matching leggings) listed on Ebay that cost $60 retail when I bought it, I made something like $54 for it on Ebay. WHEN IT WAS USED. Trust me...go watch a couple Ebay auctions for Hanna Andersson stuff and you will be shocked. I had some things listed and a lady emailed me the same day I listed them, wanted two outfits and offered to pay me $90 for both outfits if I pulled my listings and shipped them to her right away. You can't make this stuff up. So, if you haven't bought your kids any Hanna Andersson stuff ever, do it, because you'll just about get your money back when you resell it on Ebay.
• How long to list? Use 5-day or 7-day listings. That is plenty long. If you do 5-day, though, make sure the auction ENDS on a weekday (for those middle of the day people who you need bidding it up...on the weekends, people forget).
  
• Where to Ship? I limit my listings to United States only. It's time-consuming enough already without opening up to an entire planet of figuring out shipping expense. Of course, there are ALWAYS people who ignore the information in the listing and either email you asking, "hey, will you ship to Canada/Germany/etc?" And then, like happened to me last week, you have people who live in another country, like the Philippines, and go ahead and bid then win your auction. *sigh*
• What about Shipping Expense? On things that are parcels, I go to the post office and have them weighed and have them figure up the cost for Priority and Parcel. Then I add $2 for shipping supplies and the gas expense of what ends up being two trips to the post office to do all this shipping stuff. I put right in my listing that I add that $2 and why and if the person thinks that is unreasonable that they SHOULD NOT BID on the item. I also start most of my listings at 99 cents, so they're still coming out waaaaaay ahead. If I'm sending little tiny video games, or other items that are small and I can buy small padded envelopes and the shipping amount is going to be very little, I make it free shipping because Ebay will promote your item more with a big "Free Shipping" bubble on your listing. I'm not going to lose my shirt by shipping everything free, but some things it's worth it. And, make insurance optional, some people believe in it, some people think it's a waste of $$$, but they're paying for it so it shouldn't make any difference to you.
• What do I say about the Items I List? Describe the hell out of them. If it's clothes, put everything about the condition of it, because especially if it's used, people want to know just how used it is. If the fabric has some pilling, don't neglect mentioning that. If it's a bit faded, mention it. If your kid only wore it twice and the thing looks like new, mention it. And put everything from the tag...how to wash it, what it's made of, sizing, etc. Describe a lot. I do not offer returns and I put that in my listing that, unless I made a mistake and the information about the item is wrong, what you pay for is what you get, no returns, I'm not a store, I'm just a person. So, it's better to overdo it on the describing so people can't come back and say, "hey, you didn't mention this hole in the back!" By the way, if there is a defect of some kind, take an extra photo of it up close...I have sold some name brand things (like a Hanna sweater) that had some sort of fixable flaw and yes, they have sold because some people will pay next to nothing and take care of it themselves. If you are selling electronic things, try to find the same thing on Amazon or something so you can highlight the specifics, especially if you no longer have instruction booklets for stuff like that.
  
• Finishing the sale. When people win your item, give them half a day to pay on their own (if you're setting up your account to accept Paypal), most people will pay on their own fairly soon after winning the auction. If they haven't paid immediately, then go in to Ebay and send invoices on unpaid items. I put in my listing that people have 7 days from the close of the auction to pay me. I've had a couple times when people have fudged beyond that and a few emails back and forth usually takes care of it. Only once did I have a deadbeat bidder that disappeared off the face of the earth and I filed a complaint with Ebay. But 99% of the time, people know how it works and pay quickly. Allow yourself 1-2 days handling time (you can do this in the listing) to package and get items sent after payment is received. I print off an invoice from Paypal to put in with the item and once it is sent, I send the buyer an email letting them know the package is en route. You can do a lot of automated communication but most people appreciate a personal email that shows you are paying attention to getting their item to them in an efficient manner. If they paid and were easy to deal with, leave them positive feedback. If you had issues, you could leave neutral or negative feedback...I just don't leave any. My grandma always said, "if you can't say anything nice about anybody..." you know the saying. With the exception of the deadbeat bidder, I haven't had any earth-shattering problems as a seller.

That's about all I can think of right now. There's probably something else, just ask in the comments but this has worked for me, I have 100% positive feedback and I've made a little money doing it, so it's been pretty good on my end.

Anyone else have any tips or advice on Ebay, tell it!